Shannon here: When Teresa sent me her post, I was hesitant. My blog celebrates life-long marriage and romance. This doesn’t fit. But I prayed about it and realized Teresa’s cautionary tale might help someone. So here it is. Comment or answer the question at the end of any post dated March 12 – 21 to enter the drawing for a copy of her Biblical Fiction title, Woman of Light. Deadline: April 2nd, 11:59 pm central time. Here’s Teresa:
If I weren’t divorced, my story would actually make a great love story. I was happily married for almost forty years, so if you could chop off the ending, I guess it still is. Satan had to work hard and be incredibly sneaky to break our bond. Wade is still the only love of my life.
I met Wade when my best friend Linda brought him to our church youth group hay ride when we were fourteen. When we went horseback riding, I got a big white stallion that wasn’t fully broken yet, so the guides made me ride up front next to them. Linda was somewhere in the back, but Wade rode up front next to me the whole time. Later, when we did a scavenger hunt, he teamed his friend Henry with Linda and me. But he arranged it so Linda was paired with Henry most of the time.
The next time we saw each other, Linda brought him to a Job’s Daughter’s dance. He and my date conspired to hide my four inch high heels in the boy’s bathroom because they made me taller than he was at the time. He eventually grew to 6 foot, but that didn’t happen until two years later. He and Linda were fighting. I was on a semi-blind date. Wade made his interest in me clear from the start, but I wasn’t so sure about him yet. I talked with Linda and she assured me she didn’t care. So we basically danced the night away with each other’s partner.
What was different about Wade was that he could make me laugh. I’ve always been too serious about life. Wade taught me to let down my hair, both figuratively and literally, and have fun. We dated for about six months until I had a Halloween party where I was the only one who didn’t have a date for my own party because he didn’t show up! It wasn’t until two years later when we got back together that I found out he wasn’t there because his mother told him he had to stay home until she came back from trick-or-treating with his brother—and then she didn’t come back until eleven! You may guess I had an interesting time dealing with my mother-in-law throughout my marriage.
What brought us back together? Wade saw prom pictures of me with another guy, and they made him jealous. So he knew he still cared. He saw me at a sock hop at the skating ring, and came up and asked me to dance as if the two years between had never happened. We married two years later.
Forty years, three children, the birth of three grandchildren, and the death of one child later, we called it quits, but not because we didn’t love each other. With God, all things are possible. We both knew that. But both parties also have to be willing to work to solve problems. If one isn’t willing, it won’t work. I love the Lord. That’s my first priority—to serve Him. I’m physically alone now. But I’ve never been alone. (PS. Not Alone is the title of my next book, due out sometime later this year or next year from HopeSprings Books.)
I share this to say that even when you have a great marriage, be alert. One month before we split, Wade told our Sunday School teacher he was the most blessed man on earth because God had blessed him with the best wife a man could have. Satan is a roaring lion. Never take love for granted. It’s still work. Work hard at it. God bless.
About Teresas: Teresa Pollard is from Richmond, Virginia, and was saved at a young age. She has a Master of Arts degree in English and Creative Writing from Hollins College, and has served as a Sunday School teacher and children’s worker for most of the last forty years. She is the co-author of Not Guilty and Not Ashamed, and the author of Tokens of Promise and Woman of Light.
Married for forty years, she was devastated by divorce and the death of her youngest daughter, but God has blessed her with a new home and another grandson, and she now resides in Dacula, Georgia. She blogs every Tuesday at http://teresatalkstaboo.wordpress.com. Follow her on Facebook at Teresa Pollard, Author.
About the book – Woman of Light: Ehud, Israel’s great judge, is dead. He must have been out of his mind with sickness to prophesy that his granddaughter Deborah would judge Israel. Just who does she think she is? Doesn’t she know Sisera’s iron chariots threaten to annihilate the fledgling nation? And Barak? A poor man who can barely feed his own family. What kind of a God would choose two such improbable people to lead His people to battle?
Question for Readers: Have you ever dated the same person your friend or relative did?
Come back March 24th for Teresa’s excerpt!
Shelia Hall says
no that would be tacky!
Shannon Taylor Vannatter says
My husband dated a friend of mine before he dated me. But they were never serious and before we dated, I made sure it wouldn’t bother her. I was pretty besotted with him though, so if she’d have cared, I might have dated him on the sly 🙂
angela says
I loved reading this story. no i have never dated the same person my friend or relative did.
Teresa Pollard says
Thanks, Angela! Glad I’m not the only one, Shannon. Linda and Wade weren’t serious either. We were only fourteen and it was back in the sixties (before the free love movement) We were totally innocent kids! Sheila, I kind of felt the same way at the time. That’s why I had a talk with Linda first, but what would have been two miserable dates turned out to be a great night for both of us (and a lot of wonderful years for me). Sometimes we have to be open to things, but we also need to listen for God’s voice.
Ann Ellison says
I was part a youth group with the guy I eventually married. Don was dating another girl in the youth group and we double dated some. After high school, he went into the Army and I moved out of town. He and my friend broke before he left for Germany. He was home on leave and I was home for the Christmas holidays and we re-connected. We realized we were a lot more than friends and were engaged by the time he went back. We actually double dated with my friend and the guy she ended up marrying while Don was home. We celebrated 31 years of marriage in July before God called him home in 1997. Thanks for being open and sharing your story.
kim hansen says
Nope.
Teresa Pollard says
Great story, Ann! What a blessing! Hi, Kim. God bless you all for responding!
Kim Hampton says
There have been a couple of instances where a friend and I both dated the same man, of course not at the same time. One of my best friends even married one of my ex boyfriends and I was so happy for both of them.
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kim hansen says
Never dated the same person as a friend or relative.